Funeral Readings:
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Funeral Guidelines:
St. Joseph Catholic Church
Yoakum, Texas
Guidelines to Assist in the Planning of a Funeral Liturgy
Friends:
These “Guidelines” are meant to assist families and loved ones who—while grieving—must attend to basic details of funeral planning. In no way are these meant to complicate an already difficult experience. This is to draw together differing aspects of the process so that should a question be forgotten or something overlooked while meeting at the Funeral Home, simply scanning these might fill in what has not been covered. When the family meets with the funeral director it is then that scheduling will be coordinated between the Funeral Home and the Parish for the services. Next the issues connected with their choice of service and the scheduled times can better be addressed. Keep in mind that these are not “diocesan” regulations, but rather apply only to St. Joseph and St. Ann parishes.
-Fr. Huehlefeld
The Rosary [Vigil]
The proper terminology for the service the night before the Funeral is “Vigil.” It has been a longstanding custom that the Rosary is prayed either completely or at least a few decades of it, but this is not mandatory. It is the family’s choice. [As an aside…should a family--with Catholic “roots”--be having a non-Catholic Funeral Service, the parish will not provide someone to “do” a rosary the night before, as the family itself can take care of this]. Normally at a Vigil there is included readings from the Scriptures and prayers for the deceased—focusing our attention on our obligation to express our love for the deceased through prayer. It is during the Vigil that—should a family member(s) wish to speak (eulogize) or offer some memories and thoughts—this is the proper place to do so. Again…the Vigil is the place for family members to speak and reflect…it will not be done during the Funeral Mass. In most cases the deacon of the parish will be the presider, in others, when he is not available, the priest or even a representative of a society or parish organization may lead it.
The Funeral
There are basically three forms the funeral service can take: 1) the traditional Funeral Mass followed by Committal service at a cemetery; 2) funeral service at the Funeral Home chapel with no Mass followed by the Committal; 3) Graveside service. If Cremation is involved, the funeral can take place with the body prior to cremation or afterwards, with the cremains. Concerning cremation, the Church certainly allows this practice as long as it is being chosen for reasons not contradictory to the beliefs of the faith concerning Resurrection of the body, etc. The only other issue with cremation is that the Church requires that the cremains ultimately be interred or entombed in a sacred place. Once the family decides which option they desire, then certain aspects can be addressed. Concerning the Funeral Mass: this will be the traditional requiem Funeral celebrated in Church. The family will be asked about choosing the Scripture readings (a booklet containing all of the reading selections will be provided them) as well as if there will be a Lector to proclaim the Word of God. It is important that the Lector be someone who is acquainted with proclaiming the Scriptures at Mass. There is also the option for the family to have members bring up the Offertory Gifts. There is no need to secure Altar Servers, unless some in the family already does this and wants to assist. Normally there is no need for an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion (if there would be due to an expected larger attendance, the Extraordinary Minister must be someone who is appointed here at St. Joseph Parish). If the family desires to have music (it is not mandatory), then they will need to contact an organist (accustomed to playing at Mass) and arrange with them the music selection to be played (religious in nature and appropriate to what we are celebrating, i.e., no polkas, etc.). No “canned” [CD or tape player] music will be allowed during the funeral Mass. Although the organist will not make any financial demand, the family should compensate the organist with at least a gift of $50. If the family wants actual singing, then they will need to also secure a soloist to lead the singing and as well, expect to compensate him/her.
Funeral Luncheons
As has been stated previously, at times the funeral luncheons have sometimes “gotten out of control.” If the Family Center is not booked for any other event, it will be made available to the family. Do not set the funeral schedule according to the availability of the Family Center for the Meal. That sort of priority is not appropriate. If the deceased was a parishioner and the family desires to have a luncheon, our “Martha and Mary Ministry” Ladies will contact the Family to assist in this work. These ladies are purely volunteers and are simply assisting a family with a funeral luncheon. They will gather enough sandwiches and the extras to accommodate a small gathering. Anything beyond that is the family’s responsibility. As well, the family should be aware that these ladies have lives and obligations apart from the funeral luncheon—in other words—once the meal is concluded the family should assist with the cleaning and closing of the Family Center. This is not a time to linger and have a reunion. That can be done at your home. Here is an example: a 10 o’clock funeral Mass, followed by burial here in Yoakum with a funeral luncheon afterwards should be wrapping up by 1 P.M. at the latest. There should be some family members who have stayed behind to help with putting the tables and chairs in order, etc. As to fees, there is no mandated donation. Should the family want to make a donation, the “rent” for a non-parishioner to use the Family Center for a funeral meal is $125 as a comparison. If the deceased was not a parishioner and is having a funeral service through St. Joseph, the Family Center will be made available for their use if it is not previously booked, but it will be the responsibility of the family to fully provide for procuring the key, the funeral luncheon itself and cleanup afterwards. A donation will be accepted but will not be required. Reminder: No one should be insulted in the least should a family choose not to have a luncheon and simply return to their home. A funeral luncheon is NOT the most important part of the day. All of these issues are not to add to the burden of the experience, but rather insure that needed attention is made to any of the “extras” that some families may desire or wish to include.